Stoopid
Words and Music by Harry Chapin

Two and two are five
And Abraham Lincoln's alive
And London's in the South of France
Horses must wear pants

C - A - T spells dog
And a book is a bump on a log
And tin cans sing a mellow song
And the moon shines all day long

Do you want to be dumb for the rest of your life
Do you really want to be stupid
And when you grow up you get a very dumb wife
And then you can have yourself a dumb few kids

Sugar tastes so bitter
And salt is very sweet
A shark's a babysitter
And rocks are good to eat

Aw soapsuds make you dirty
And coal dust makes you clean
My Grandpa almost thrity
But Grandma's just thirteen

Do you want to be dumb for the rest of your life
Do you really want to be stupid
And when you grow up you get a very dumb wife
And then you can have yourself a dumb few kids

It's foggy when it's clear
There's an elbow in your ear
The world is made of dyanmite
That's almost right

Do you want to be dumb for the rest of your life
Do you really want to be stupid
And when you grow up you get a very dumb wife
And then you can have yourself a dumb few kids

And then you can have yourself a dumb few kids
Stupid!