Laughman
Words and Music by Harry Chapin

Did you ever hear the one about...

Oh God I love myself
When I've got it on
I know I'll live forever Babe
All my fears are gone

Suddenly I'm dying
They turned the laugh track off
Drowning in the silence
Cruicfied by coughs

I am the laugh man
Half clown and half man
Half out and half in
Mister can't you see
I'm supposed to leave you laughing
Why don't you laugh at me

I started out by starving
Desperate for money
My belly cracking dirty jokes
That didn't come out funny

My neck stuck out so far
Like a gawky giraffe
Screaming on a guillotine
Come on sucker, laugh

I am the laugh man
Half clown and half man
Half out and half in
Mister can't you see
I'm supposed to leave you laughing
Why don't you laugh at me

I am the guy
Who always catches the pie
I specialize in pratfalls
I am the goon
Who flashes the moon
A mouse in a house of catcalls

I'm your jester, your joker
Your juggler, your friend
I'm nothing more or less
Than a horses nether end


My ego is a bubble
That I realize just broke
And alone without a microphone
My real life's a joke

I am the laugh man
Half clown and half man
Half out and half in
Mister can't you see
I'm supposed to leave you laughing
Why don't you laugh at me

Did you ever hear the one about...